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Dana, Bloomington, Illinois, November 15, 1989
On this particular night, everything was quiet. It was cold outside since it
was mid November. At the time, I had a 1 year old daughter, and had a baby
that was born two months earlier. I remember being very tired that night
when I put the two children to bed (they both shared a room). I trucked my
daughter into bed and put the baby in his crib. I turned on a little lamp
that sat on the dresser and then turned in for the night.
My room was just down the hallway a few feet. I fell asleep without
difficulty as did the children. Sometime during the night, I was awakened
out of my deep sleep. I remember sitting straight up in bed unable to move.
I tried to move with everything I had, but I felt like I was paralyzed.
While I was sitting up in my bed, I saw what looked like an angel walking
from my children's room. This angel had on a long flowing robe that looked a
little transparent. His arms were folded as if cradling a baby. In my mind I
heard, "Don't worry, everything's going to be alright." And, "This is the
way things have to be. Now be peaceful." As I was hearing this, the angel
holding the baby continued walking toward our front door. After the "Be
peaceful," came into my mind, I laid back down, unable to do anything else,
and went back to sleep.
The next morning, my husband was leaving for work pretty early and gave me a
kiss goodbye. I was still in bed at this time. Before he left, I asked him
if he had checked on the children. He replied no and then turned to go look
in on them. As he was walking toward their room, my heart started beating
furiously, and I jumped out of bed and dialed 911 before my husband saw what
had happened. As I was on the phone with the operator, I heard my husband
start screaming, "He's dead! He's dead!" And I started shaking and crying as
I was talking to the operator. The paramedics arrived and my husband was
carrying our baby out to the ambulance, and I was carrying our 1 year-old
daughter. As I was going out the door, a very strong, cold blast of air
rushed right through me and out the door in front of me. It was strong
enough to make all of my hair fly forward. At the hospital our beautiful
newborn son was pronounced dead. They did an autopsy and the only diagnosis
they could give was SIDS. My son would be turning 18 this year if he were
still around. I still hurt terribly over this. It is hard to find any peace,
even if an angel told me so.